Soon Well Be Found- Sia

Its been a very long weekend and very long beginning of the week. I have run myself ragged and now my body decided," If your not gonna slow your roll im gonna slow it for you." Which leads me to the reason im in bed at 3:00... pm. 

This weekend I discovered the feeling of truly being scared for someones life. During the summer I lost my grandmother but this wasnt the same feeling. Watching Gran slowly deteriorate for months was one of the hardest things iv ever had to endure,  but as crazy as it sounds, it was almost less painful in the end. I was able to brace myself for the painful truth. I  had time to accept that the person whom I considered my sunshine, my heart, and my laugh  would soon be  a lifeless body and a distant memory. This time there was no time to brace myself....

The phone rings while video chatting with mom and john. 

Moms telling me about paula and her crazy adventure that day

its too good to interrupt 

I push the black button. 

ill call her later, i say to myself. 

five minutes later the phone rings again... 

510?

no idea who that is...

black button.

sorry go on mom.

...

two rings and an answer

Megan?

yes?

*sobbing*

they dont think hes going to make it.

What does that mean? "they". They who? the doctors? His mom? The school? WHO? Why does this seem so sudden? He was fine three weeks ago. I just talked to him yesterday. ButI couldnt get myself to ask any of those questions. Honestly? I instantly thought of the last time I saw him. The last thing that was said. The things I said and the things that I didnt say.

Sit and think about the last three people you talked to today. If you got a call tomarrow saying they were no longer here would your conversation been different? would you regret the things you said or wished you said something more?

     You would think I just typed up a chain letter and all im missiing is the "send this to ten people or youll have a bad love life for the next ten years" These words have a different meaning when it happens to you.. trust me.

This weekend Jaclin and Kemi were truely my rocks. They eased my thoughts and put a smile on my face when I thought it was impossible. They showed me the meaning of true friendship. Truely irreplaceable.